Wednesday- We have lately been trying to 'solve' issues at school for our 3-year old. Yes- 3 years old! She surely has a mind of her own and thinks a bit too much. From social to emotional issues, it's all stuck in her head. The 'thinking chair' placed in her class is her biggest enemy. She feels it would be the biggest crime if she got there even by chance. Of course everyone from her teachers to us at home are only consoling her, cajoling her and hoping this is a phase that shall also pass. And for me it has been about understanding and accepting that what worked for my elder one may not work for the younger.
Her current phase got me thinking. With my elder one the problems at this age were different. It was more her choice of food at school, her shyness to open up and make friends, her obsession towards tidiness and perfection. And then you realise, how different each person in a family is. Your kids so strangely have a bit of you in them.
If one likes cheese, the other ketchup, if one likes the dosa crisp the other likes it soft, if one keeps her cupboard clean the other can't be bothered. If one likes her chicken 'roasted', the other just wants 'chicken'- period. If one likes sporty stuff, the other likes to sing and dance at the drop of a hat! I always recollect what someone once told me, "God does an excellent quality control job in every home." And how true it is.
Friday- This Friday evening was spent taking off our Diwali lights and transferring them to the Xmas tree. For the kids it's another festival coming up. But the elder one has now started asking questions about religion, places of worship, what am I, etc. I think having been brought up in a family that made me believe always that 'it's all in the mind' is making it easier for me to answer her questions.
She sees Biryani being cooked every Eid, Diwali being festive time and the Xmas tree up every December since she was born. The tree in our home is actually older than her! There are questions now asked, "Is it okay if I pray at a mosque or a church and not always at a temple?" My answer, "It's fine even if you sit just on your bed and pray."
I wonder if I asked such questions in my childhood or did I blindly accept what was told. Of course I recollect celebrating Eid at friend's homes, tying rakhi to family friends, celebrating Diwali and Onam with equal excitement. Being a witness to the riots that Delhi faced in 1984 and sheltering 'close friends' in the confines of our home. Each of that left a mark on me and made me more accepting of people and their thinking as I grew up.
This may be a small way in which I can teach them to accept people and their beliefs just the way they are....